Elections 2016 — let’s end this!

Martini glass in hand, courage in my heart, I’m ready to blog.

11:04. In my first legitimate shock of the evening, Russ Feingold lost his race in Wisconsin. The West coast is decided, which we know. North Carolina goes to Trump: 209-187.

10:41. Florida isn’t close. But Obama won enough in 2012, recall, that Florida wasn’t called for days. He didn’t need Florida.

10:30. Colorado called for Clinton.

10:23. Ohio called for Trump.

10:05. New Mexico called for Clinton.

9:56. Still waiting. Third glass of wine.

9:46. With 94 percent of the vote in Florida, it doesn’t look like she win it.

9:31. I’m not freaking out yet because (a) I’m not a freaking out person (b) I called Florida for Clinton but would not be surprised if it had gone Trump. What would chill me is if Virginia and Pennsylvania did. I was not one of those people who predicted an early evening. If I start hearing good news from those states and North Carolina and Virginia, then the tone of the broadcast will change.

9:26. The breakdown: Trump outperforming Romney in rural counties; these Republicans didn’t stay at home after all.

9:17. Florida still holding but at the moment not looking good. North Carolina, however, according to Jon King, has a “long way to go.”

9:07. People, remember: the biggest Democratic counties have the most uncounted ballots by far. Why? They have more ballots to count.

8:58. 53 percent of vote in Palm Beach County.

8:52. Close to a million votes still not counted. 16 percent of Broward reporting.

8:43. North Carolina too close to call: a difference of 68,000 votes. Georgia still too early to call. She’s running stronger in Broward than Obama at this point in the evening in 2012.

8:39. I apologize for lagging. Florida has me falling into my bourbon glass. Broward County vote still lagging.

8:31. Amendment 2, the medical marijuana amendment on the Florida ballot, passed comfortably.

8:16. Florida is in a death match. On CNN the vote totals keep flipping between candidates. In MIami-Dade she’s doing better than Obama; in small counties like Hernando County, Chuck Todd points out, Trump is up more than five points over Romney. But Palm Beach and Broward counties aren’t close to counting live votes. Calm down.

8:12. UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH — MSNBC predicts Marco Rubio as winner

8:01. Cigarette Break #1. White college grads in Florida winning 61 percent — a slight upset. But Clinton has a 29-point lead with Hispanics. Meanwhile Pennsylvania: Clinton winning 50 percent of white college grads.

7:49. Chuck Todd to James Carville: “James, what does Bill Clinton think of losing the Bubba vote?”

7:45. WSVN-7 reporting that Miami-Dade and Broward’s Hispanic vote surpassed 2012’s totals.

7:42. Tucker Carlson of FOX Nwes, still a haircut in search of a head and brain, said he’s shocked the Hispanic vote isn’t higher.

7:37: CNN reports, according to Noah Rothman, that with 35 percent of the vote in Florida, Clinton “is out-performing Obama.”

7:32. Rob Portman wins, to no surprise, reelection in Ohio.

7:27. North Carolina’s bathroom bill “the last of the culture war battles.” Fuck you, Chuck Todd.

7:19: MSNBC has invited Rudy Giuliani to comment because they want to laugh at him.

7:18. Why the fuck does anyone care about “honest and trustworthy” after Richard Nixon, Ronald Reagan, and Bill Clinton? I don’t want a president in whom I’d confide my boy problems. Such a media question.

7:13. “Largest Puerto Rican diaspora ever,” avers Kerry Sanders of NBC. Get Out the Vote battle? What battle? Clinton people “bringing voters in cars,” Trump, well, nothing.

7:11. Champion social media watcher Ned Raggett sends me this tweet from Sean T at Real Clear Politics:

Sean T at RCP ‏@SeanTrende 26 minutes ago

This is going to be a short night.

7:05: Vermont called for Hillary Clinton, Indiana for Donald J. Trump. Georgia too close to call, Virginia too early to call. “Is it about class warfare? Is this how the modern campaign will be waged?” asks Nicole Wallace of MSNBC, formerly one of George W. Bush’s communications people, which meas she helped him talk.

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