Scales fall from Disney’s eyes

My oldest niece and I play a game we call Farmer John, involving a Fisher Price barn and action figures, plus two dozen animals. The villain is an alligator, who with his allies Rhino and Brown Bear scheme to break into the barn and steal ducklings, lambs, and calves. Often a deux ex machina named the Bear of Snow Mountain intervenes. I suspect comparable sorcery bewitched Walt Disney World administrators into purging alligators and crocodiles from attractions:

Louis, the trumpet-playing alligator from the 2009 film The Princess and the Frog, was supposed to be a part of the Friendship Faire castle show at Magic Kingdom, but got pulled just days before the show premiered on June 23, according to a Disney employee, who asked to remain anonymous because of job security. The alligator was supposed to play trumpet during the show.

The Tic Toc Croc from Peter Pan, known for hunting villain Captain Hook, was also removed from the Festival of Fantasy parade at Magic Kingdom, park guests reported.

The Jungle Cruise has also changed its scripts, stopping employees from making jokes like “but remember, folks, if you don’t watch your children, the crocodiles will,” as they narrate an adventure ride through rivers across the world, according to the Hollywood Reporter. The script, known for its puns, has been in place since 1962.

Guides on the Kilimanjaro Safari ride at Disney’s Animal Kingdom have also removed references to the predators, the Daily Mail reported. Staff no longer claim the tour bridge could dump them into the crocodile pit below.

I know Disney worries about so-called emotional distress lawsuits, but it strikes me, a WDW veteran whose parents honeymooned at the Contemporary Resort, as better economics, not to mention psychology, to demystify the fucking things.

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